I read this poem and it sounds like me....

Complicated Feelings Of Depression

  By Amanda

When I smile deep inside I want to frown
when I laugh deep inside I want to cry
when you look into my eyes
You think every thing is alright
But deep inside
I want to die
maybe one day
I won’t feel like this
till then I’ll be happy in the outside
and crying in the inside

I read this poem and it sounds like me

Birthday Lunch....

with Nick yesterday at Chili's. Nick sports a new look. I did not recognize him until he spoke.

22 years ago....April 20, 1990

Nick & Nana

Dec 25, 2002

a precious little boy became part of my life. My first grandchild Nicholas Sterling Hill. He is a blessing. I am so proud of him.
.

out with the old, in with the brand new.....

 

See my great idea for Perry's bedside lamp! I saw this fill able base lamp at Target and the idea formed. Perry loves his little Hot Wheels cars and I have been trying to phase out his "valuable" antique lamp for over 25 years. We got the new lamp and filled it with some of his loose Hot Wheel treasures and voila' instant new collectible lamp. Before you criticize me for doing away with one of my husband's prized possessions just ask yourself...do I want home accessories with nipples?  hmmmm. It is also motorized. With the turn of a switch she dances a hula for you.When  Joy was not yet a teen she loaned Perry a Barbie bra for his exotic beauty to wear. See even a child knew something was amiss with this lamp.

BTW...Perry informed me his prize lamp is a 1940's Dodge hula girl with the headache pose and one sold on ebay for over $500. My response...let's post that thing. Don't worry.. it is not to be, she has been lovingly packed away to grace Perry's man den I pray he has someday.

Did you ever...

stop to think and forget to start again?

Winnie the Pooh


One of my daily reads is "Chicken Soup for the Scrapbookers Soul" Love these short stories. They are so uplifting. Just starting on my second one this year (2012) Oh my, have I digressed.... The quote by Winnie the Pooh hit me right in my emotions. Call them senior moments, too much going on...whatever. I seem to have one of these a few times a week. No, I am not laying claim to any disease or condition..NO!No! I think, yes, that's it. I think more these days. I know I ask God more often "What do I need to think about, Lord? and, what should be forgotten?"  hmmm.

"Blest Is The Man Whose Bowels Move " By Issac Watts

Blest is the man whose bowels move,
And melt with pity to the poor;
Whose soul, by sympathizing love,
Feels what his fellow saints endure.

2. His heart contrives for their relief
More good than his own hands can do;
He, in the time of gen'ral grief,
Shall find the Lord has bowels too.

3. His soul shall live secure on earth,
With secret blessings on his head,
When drought, and pestilence, and dearth
Around him multiply their dead.

4. Or if he languish on his couch,
God will pronounce his sins forgiv'n;
Will save him with a healing touch,
Or take his willing soul to heav'n.

Isaac Watts (1674-1748)

Yes, this is an actual olden hymn..I downloaded a free devotional on my Kindle that uses hymns as the daily devotionals..It is titled "Near to the Heart of God" by Robert J Morgan. So far I am really enjoying it. Oh yes..bowels also means the part of something deep inside a larger part..the inner workings of a bigger thing.

See Psalms 41:1-3

For the director of music. A psalm of David.
¹ Blessed are those who have regard for the weak;
the LORD delivers them in times of trouble.
² The LORD protects and preserves them—
they are counted among the blessed in the land—
he does not give them over to the desire of their foes.
³ The LORD sustains them on their sickbed
and restores them from their bed of illness